Body language

Yesterday I was at Westfield trying to cut through a piece of tandoori chicken with plastic knife and fork and in the process flicked salad, rice and chicken onto the table next to me! But that's another story. Anyway, I happened to notice a customer talking with one of the food hall providers. I Immediately realised that they were arguing, or at least they looked like they were because of their body language and gestures like pointing fingers, shaking their heads (I couldn't hear them because they were far away and the food court was packed and the noise drowned out any chance of hearing the two people argue).

I watched closely how the two of them behaved as they spoke and how they listened. When they spoke they tended to lean in and force their words with pointing fingers and forceful nods of their heads. I tried to read their lips and occasionally I thought I could detect some obvious swear words and insults. It was really interesting to watch from afar how they communicated their problems. There was another service provider behind the high glass counter and he seemed to be embarrassed by the fuss his boss was making (I considered the man arguing to be the boss as the the worker said and did nothing). Finally the lady arguing with stopped and walked along the side of the service counter as if to get away from the argument, however, she took some plastic cutlery and a straw and walked back to where she was arguing. Suddenly a meal was delivered from the back kitchen and the customer waved and walked away to her seat.

The man who was arguing then started laughing with the other man behind the counter. The situation truly confused me because I was sure the two were having a heated argument but by the end of the 'argument' they seemed to be two people who were not in fact arguing.

The lesson I learned was that body language and non-verbal communication is all well and good to study and learn, yet, the reality is cultural, social and interactive factors in the real world play a significant part in communication and that is something one cannot just 'learn'. Communication as a whole must take into account the context and the individualistic situation at hand.

By the way i took my son to see 'Gnomeo and Juliet' which was a real cracker of a movie and for my boy to sit through an entire film without running up and down the cinema stairs is saying something. In fact I loved the movie and recommend it because it's really funny and the music and songs are excellent. See you in class on Tuesday (the photo above is of yours truly in Iraq in 1991 - how cool are those sunnies?).